100+ Sympathy Messages for the Death of a Daughter

Heartfelt Condolences for the Loss of a Daughter

Let the parents of the deceased know you're there for them in their time of need. The loss of a loved one is never easy, but losing a child is a particular grief. Parents usually expect to pass before their children, and when a child goes first, the pain that follows is like no other. Licensed clinical psychologist Vernita Marsh, PhD, advises letting the parents know, in the most basic terms, that you're there for support as they navigate this tremendous loss: "Thinking of you, this time you are in my thoughts, or you're in my prayers. Those kinds of things are very useful." I don't know what to say, except that I love you, I loved your daughter, and I'm here for you. You're not alone. I am so sorry to hear about your recent loss of your daughter. Know that if you need anything, I am here for you. I was so saddened to learn of the loss of your daughter. If you need someone to talk to, I am here to lend an ear. Though [insert daughter's name] was only in our lives for [insert daughter's age], I cannot tell you how much I adored her. I am here to support you always. Words cannot express how sorry I am for the loss of your daughter. I feel honored to have spent time with her and will miss her every day. I am happy to help you with whatever you need, whether it's dinner, cleaning, laundry, or just lending an ear, I am here for you no matter what. I cannot even begin to express how awful this is and I so wish you weren't going through this. [Insert daughter's name] was the most amazing child and I know she will be deeply missed. Please let me know if you need anything. Is it okay if I check in with you later? I am saddened that [insert daughter's name] passed away. She was an amazing person who will be missed by many. While I didn't know [insert daughter's name] well, I have only heard wonderful things about her. I know she was an incredible presence that drew everybody in. Please let me know what I can do to help. The world has taken your most precious love, and my heart is broken for you. We are praying for you and love you. The phrase "there are no words" seems like the only thing that fits right now. I cannot fathom what you're going through, but I love you and am thinking of you. Life seems incredibly cruel and arbitrary right now; I cannot find meaning in what has happened. I love you and will be thinking of you and praying for you. If I can do anything more, please let me know how I can help. I cannot imagine how awful and bleak your world looks right now. I'm praying that hope and comfort flood your life during this dark time. This is the most awful thing that could have happened, and I cannot believe that it happened to you, such a wonderful person. It's unfair and horrible, and I'm so sorry. I'm so heartbroken at the loss of [insert daughter's name]. Anything I can do for you, just let me know. I'm here, and I love you. Check out our forum on what to say when someone dies to get advice from other users who have been through this experience before. Meet the wikiHow Experts Dr. Vernita Marsh is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist with over 30 years of clinical psychology experience. Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist who specializes in helping clients struggling with depression, life transitions, and relationships. Joseph Phillips, MSW is a Clinical Therapist and Social Worker at Transformative Growth Counseling, which is based in Illinois and Florida. Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP is a clinical therapist with over 18 years of experience. John Lundin, PsyD, is a clinical psychologist with 20 years experience treating mental health issues.

Short Condolences for the Loss of a Daughter

Even a brief sympathy message can carry a lot of meaning. You don't need to share a long message with the bereaved to convey your condolences—and they may not have the time or energy to read or reply to a long message, anyhow. A short note of sympathy can still hold a lot of weight, and will surely be appreciated by the grieving parents: [Insert daughter's name] was such a light. She'll never be forgotten. Your daughter touched so many lives. I'm heartbroken for you. Please let me know what I can do. I know your world is so dark right now. Sending you light through my love. I'll always be there for you. Sending you positive thoughts and lots of love. You're in my thoughts. Let me know if I can help with anything. There are no words to convey how terrible this is. You are in my prayers. I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your daughter. Please reach out any time; we're all thinking of you. My heart aches for you and your family. Sending all my love and prayers during this time. Words cannot express how sorry I am for your loss. You are in my thoughts. May you find peace and solace in the memories you shared. My condolences to you and your family at this painful time. May the cherished memories of [insert daughter's name] bring you comfort in this time of sorrow. My deepest sympathies. Grief is a journey, and I'm going to be here for you every step of the way. When you are ready, I am here for you. I'm praying every day for your comfort and for you to be able to find joy again. I love you. We're thinking of your family. Please let me know how we can support you. We'll never forget [insert daughter's name]. She was a marvelous woman. Words can't express how sad I am to hear of [insert daughter's name]'s passing—but if I can show how much I love you through my actions, let me know.

Condolences for the Sudden Loss of a Daughter

After an unexpected death, share a message expressing your sorrow and support. The sudden loss of a child is sure to leave parents reeling with grief and confusion, but a sincere message to express your care and concern may help them find grounding and feel supported in a disorienting and difficult time. I'm shocked and heartbroken to hear of the death of [insert daughter's name]. It's not fair—the brain and the heart can make no sense of it. What I do know is that you're not alone, you have friends all around you, waiting to help and show you how loved you are, and I am one of them. Please reach out when you're ready I was stunned to hear of the death of your daughter. I have no language for such grief—but I am here for you whenever you need someone to talk to, or to just be near. I love you. I'm so sorry to hear of [insert daughter's name]'s sudden passing. We don't have to talk at all if you don't want to; I'm happy to just drop off groceries on your doorstep if that's what you need. I was shocked to hear of [insert daughter's name]'s passing. There is no sense to any of this. Though I will never know the pain you're feeling, please know I'm here for you. At any hour, I'm just a phone call away. Please know that however you're feeling right now—sad, numb, guilty, tired, angry—it's normal. There's no right way to feel. I love you and am so sad that you're going through this. [Insert daughter's name] was just the best, and it's so completely unfair that this has happened. I love you so much and am here for anything you need. Words can't express my shock and grief, but I am here for you and your family, day or night. I'm completely heartbroken for you and your family. [Insert daughter's name]'s sudden passing has left us reeling. Whenever you're ready, I'm here for you—to talk, to listen, or to do whatever I can to make this difficult time easier.

Condolences for the Loss of an Adult Daughter

The death of a child is never, ever easy, whether she's a kid or grown up. To the parents of the deceased, she'll always be their little girl. Share these condolence messages to let them know that their daughter will never be forgotten, and that they're not alone in their grief. Words cannot express how deeply I feel for you during this time. We are all going to miss [insert daughter's name]. I am here for whatever you need. From our family to yours, we cannot tell you how much we are going to miss [insert daughter's name]. She was truly an incredible woman that we feel honored to have known. I wish I could say or do something to make this better. I am here to support you and want to know if it's okay if I check in with you again tomorrow. I usually get up at the crack of dawn to go for my run—if you're overcome by grief and want to talk about it one of these mornings, please know that you can call me, even if the sun's not up yet! I know that grief doesn't wait for "business hours." You know that I'm always up until at least midnight—please know that you can give me a call if you need to talk to someone, even if it's super late. And if you don't want to talk and just want to know there's another person on the other end of the line, that's okay, too. I know your grief must seem insurmountable. Please know that I'm thinking of you and praying for you. I'm so sorry to hear of the loss of your daughter. Be kind and gentle with yourself. Take your time. This is beyond difficult. My heart goes out to you as I send my heartfelt sympathy to you at this sad time. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm sharing in your sadness and praying for you during this difficult time. I know that you will never forget her, and I hope you're able to soon remember the happy memories and hold tight to them. If you'd ever like to get together to share stories about [insert daughter's name], I'd love to; I'll bring over snacks and wine, or we could meet for coffee—whatever you'd like. Grief is such a complex part of life, and everything you're feeling right now is normal, even though it seems strange and is so difficult to navigate. I am beyond sorry to hear about the passing of your daughter. They were truly a light in our lives and our family will miss them every day. Please let me know if you need anything—our whole family is here for you. I heard about the loss of your daughter, and I wanted to let you know that I'm so sorry. It's difficult to get through times like this, and I hope that you're able to find the comfort and strength that you need. Please know that I'm thinking of you and pulling for you. Finding your way to a new normal will be difficult, I'm sure. I'd love to help with errands, babysitting, washing dishes, picking up groceries, or whatever else you need. I know these daily tasks can seem incredibly overwhelming in the wake of a loss. If I can help in any way, please know that I'm only a text away. Words cannot express just how sorry I am to hear about (insert child's name) recent passing. She was a beautiful person who was gracious to everyone around her. Please reach out anytime if you'd like to talk or need anything.

Quotes to Share after the Loss of a Daughter

When you're at a loss for words, consider sharing a meaningful quote. Death, whenever it comes, feels wholly unique and inimitable. But death has been coming since the beginning of time, and since the beginning of time, mourners have found ways to put their unique grief into words. When you can't summon the language to express your condolences, take comfort in a quote from a celebrated figure—and share that comfort with the bereaved parents. "To live in this world / you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal; to hold it / against your bones knowing your own life depends on it; and, when the time comes to let it go, to let it go." —Mary Oliver "Her absence is like the sky, spread over everything.” —C. S. Lewis "What we have once enjoyed deeply we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” —Helen Keller "Unable are the loved to die, for love is immortality.” —Emily Dickinson "After tonight, what’s left of you is you / moving into my dream…. / Listen, crying bird, / to live without this sadness is to see the mountain / without its weight, rivers without depth." —Zhang Xian (translated by Shangyang Fang) “The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered.” —Elisabeth Kübler-Ross “Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.” —Vicki Harrison "Love is like the wind; you can’t see it, but you can feel it.” —Nicholas Sparks “Grief is the price we pay for love.” –Queen Elizabeth II “Even the darkest night will end, and the sun will rise.” —Victor Hugo “When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure.” —Unknown "Death is nothing else but going home to God, the bond of love will be unbroken for all eternity." — Mother Teresa "End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path, one that we all must take. The gray rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it." — J.R.R. Tolkien "Death? Be as proud as you want: bore me later, because Love is sovereign here. Life never ends. Joy comes in the morning. Glory hallelujah. And let it be so." — Anne Lamott "Grief when it comes, it is nothing like we expect it to be." — Joan Didion “When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.” —Kahlil Gibran

Bible Verses to Share with Grieving Parents

If the parents are Christian, consider sharing a spiritual sympathy note. If you know the parents of the person who has passed on are religious, they may take comfort in a meaningful Bible message that reminds them God is looking out for them, and that their daughter is in a better place. If you know the parents aren't religious, or if you're uncertain as to their beliefs, it's best to keep religion out of your sympathy messages; if you wish, you can pray for the bereaved on your own. "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." — Matthew 11:28-30 "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." —Psalm 34:18 "The Lord your God is with you, and he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." — Zephaniah 3:17 "Record my lament; list my tears on your scroll — are they not in your record?" — Psalm 56:8 "My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken." — Psalm 62:1-2 "Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy. He who goes out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with him." — Psalm 126:5-6 "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." — Isaiah 41:10 "But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold." — Job 23:10 "The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace." — Psalm 29:11 "Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall." — Psalm 55:22 "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." — Isaiah 43:2-3a "I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name." — Isaiah 45:3 "Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." — Jeremiah 33:3 "Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'The Lord is my portion, therefore I will wait for him.'" — Lamentations 3: 21-24 "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows." — 2 Corinthians 1: 3-5

Condolence Texts for the Loss of a Daughter

Sometimes, a quick text message can provide comfort. "While texting can often be seen as impersonal and can sometimes lead to communication snafus, it can also be a quick and valuable tool to let your friends know you are thinking about them and wishing them well," says licensed clinical psychologist Supatra Tovar, PsyD, RD. If you believe the grieving loved one would appreciate a text over a phone call or visit, or if you want to send a quick text before coming up with a longer message, try these examples: Our hearts are breaking for you. Let us know what we can do, day or night. I just heard about [insert daughter's name]—are you doing OK? Such a silly question to even ask. I can come over whenever you're ready. Wishing you comfort during this dark time. We are so sorry for your loss. Please know that I'm thinking of you. These are trying times, and I'm here for you if you ever need me, no matter the hour. The sky is so gray for you right now; I hope the clouds part soon. I'm so sorry for your loss. Please don't hesitate to call if I can help with anything. Thinking of you and hoping there is sunshine in your life soon. I'm just a phone call or a text away. Please don't hesitate to reach out. Our hearts are breaking for you; we hate that you're going through this. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Thinking of you. Praying for your peace and comfort during this difficult time. I don't know how you feel, but I am here to help in any way I can. No one can ever prepare us for the loss of a loved one. Your strength is admirable. Remember that I'm here for you. Sending you a virtual hug. I'm here for you! Sending my most heartfelt sympathy to you and your family. Our prayers and thoughts are with you. Please reach out if you need anything. We're so sorry for your loss.

What to Consider When Expressing Condolences

Consider personalizing your message by sharing fond memories of the deceased. "I think that part of mourning is having memories, and especially good memories can help someone kind of move through those stages of grief," observes clinical therapist Joseph Phillips, MSW. The grieving parents will probably appreciate hearing how their daughter touched the lives of those around her, and that she'll never be forgotten. "I'll always remember her in the school musical last year, in her knight costume with the rosy makeup—she was such a vision, and so funny." "I'll never forget how excited she was to see me whenever I came over. I never knew someone so effortlessly kind and genuine. You raised her so well."

Ask what you can do to help—not if you can help. Then, follow through. "Even if a friend says, 'No, I am fine, or I don't need anything,' follow up a few days later to see if they need anything," says Dr. Tovar. "Sometimes, people can adopt a belief that they can't count on anyone. Prove them wrong." She adds: "Give some tangible actions you can perform on their part, and be prepared to follow through with your offer." "Consider sending a meal over," therapist Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP suggests. "Offer to pick up their children from school. See if they'd like to come over and just sit on your couch to get out of the house." Here are some other examples of what you might offer, depending on the person's particular situation and your abilities: "I'm working from home this week, so I can come by to take your dogs out whenever you need." "I know you've been stressed about housework—why don't you take the day to yourself and I'll clean up the house for you?" "Let's go see a movie sometime this week. It might be good to get away for a few hours." "If you need a parenting break, let me know—I'd love to take the kids off your hands for an afternoon." "Call or come over whenever you need, day or night. My ringer is on."

Avoid implying that the death was "meant to be." "Do not say or imply that everything happens for a reason, as this can feel offensive," clinical psychologist John A. Lundin, PsyD stresses, "and do not try to fix [their] problems or succumb to the pressure to make [them] feel better." Some people feel inclined to say a death is part of God's plan or that there was some divine, unknowable reason for a death, but these sentiments often stem from uncertainty over what to say and, perhaps, discomfort witnessing other people's grief. Resist any urge to express these types of sentiments, since—while they're probably meant well—they can come off dismissive or even controlling. Additionally, when a grieving parent hears that there is a "reason" for their daughter's death, they may feel as if you are telling them they shouldn't grieve. They may feel unsafe expressing their sadness.

When you're not sure what to say, "I'm here for you" is enough. We all experience grief and loss, and yet, somehow, when they happen—to us or to others—we often find ourselves at a loss for how to react. No words seem to be enough. But if you find yourself unsure of what to say to a loved one dealing with the loss of a daughter, remember that expressing your love and support in the most basic way will often, even if what you say feels cliche or simple. The very worst thing you could do is say nothing at all. You can even be upfront about your failure to find the right words: "I don't know what to say, except that I love you and I'm here." It's also possible they won't want to talk about their loss, notes licensed psychologist Catherine Boswell, PhD: "If they do not want to talk about it, ask how you might be of service to them, and have some specific suggestions in mind in case they do not. These might include just sitting with them, listening to or playing music, reading to them, praying with them if appropriate, etc."