How to Accept Everything the Way It Is

Ask what motivates you to be after a topic or person.

There is a reason behind every chase you make. If you realized that you were paying too much attention to it or them, that you needed to get away from that influence, you might be making a step closer to accepting everything the way it is. Trying to not allow change can take up a lot of your time. It can waste your efforts and drain you. You might lose your interest in more important responsibilities that are time bound. That you must complete now. Like studies, self-care, exploring, planning and more. When this fight doesn't bring you peace and calm, try accepting it. You might see the beauty in it as it is.

See what influences you to take control.

There are some topics that constantly derive opinions and group talks. When you discuss more, you get more opinions about how it should be. It pushes you to condemn how things are in its current state. Take for instance the system. Many people complain about the system. It could be the political system, their school system, the way anything runs, a person etc. To be accepting, allow room to gradually learn more and more about an entity. Be it the system, people, nature, organizations or anything else.

Analyze why you have a need to accept things the way they are.

Why you want to build acceptance can unlock results sooner. When you know and accept your motive, you tend to see clearly and may get more accepting. If you tend to have an opinion or a desire to control everything you see, you might feel driven to do it to the extent of being drained by it. Now ask why or what motivates you to be more accepting. Some reasons could be: You feel that you had an uncontrollable desire to reject everything. You found your reasoning needed to be more unbiased. You were told that you lack empathy. You want to live in peace, not wondering about how everything should be. You want to be at peace by accepting how things are, etc.

Examine the truth about opinions.

One's view on something might not be the right view or the only view about it. Moreover, it would help to know that everyone has opinions. Some base it on facts, some on thoughts, some on what they want it to be like and some on popular belief. Your truth need not be any greater in credibility than another's truth. One object or person can have more truths about it or them than one. For instance, a person can be mischievous in your opinion. And for another, they might be quite smart. These both can be true about one person. If you feel their mischief makes you want to change them, you must try to see two things- Your own nature, with all its complexities. And, how it would create chaos or disturbance if someone tried to impose and change you (assuming it is for the better) for your own good. You might create an unhealthy imbalance by successfully changing, or successfully trying to change something. True acceptance comes when you are ready to allow all these opinions to rest. Because it is not logical nor yours to force upon another.

Understand how people and events impact you.

What is the most important thing in your life? Whose happiness matters the most to you? Has a new person entered your life? Listen to people. However, you don't have to follow each one of them. Newer people bring their experiences along. Their thought process may make you question your own. Such questioning might reveal more about you and where you stand. If it is a person or some people who have made you feel more accepting, then you can take it as a positive influence and be accepting of their impact. You can embrace it and be as open-minded as you feel, day by day. These people may not be the same forever. Hence, you can stay true to your decision and not feel confusion cloud you if or when your influencers change.

Get over the pain of forcing and failing.

Many take up the role to change others unfairly. The very act of changing someone is not humane. It is not yours to dominate someone or something. Even parents who have given birth to their child are not to be harshly domineering. They are to be affectionately caring and protecting their child. You as a person have much less or no right to mold anything for selfish gains or desires. When things don't change your way, it brings hurt and pain. It makes you see your motives. When you know rights are common for all, then why not allow them to be?

Allow everything to be.

It is unfair to change something that should be allowed to change, grow or learn to be on its own. For example, trying to cut down trees to make way for a tourist attraction, or expecting someone to change something like their dressing, habits, or anything else to make it seem appropriate for you might be inhuman. It deprives the other person to learn and understand things for themselves. Just like you desire the freedom to choose, whether or not you found it, freedom is for everyone, whether small or big, rich or poor, and everybody regardless of a debate. If you feel or believe that the present state of something is not okay or right as it is, see that it can be how it is for various reasons. You need to open your eyes to other possibilities to let go or just let go regardless of what you see.

Understand change.

Change is constant. Name one thing that never changes, ever? You might not find anything. Whether living or nonliving, everything changes in one way or another over time. Mindsets evolve, people age, plants turn into trees, rivers dry and then fill up again, mountains grow and so on. See how following a course is exciting. Everything follows a course. Like iron rust when it gets old and dust settles on it. Plastic doesn't, the same way. That's what creates a problem. With time and influences of all kinds, everything changes. It would be wise to not come in the way of change which is a process everything follows. When you allow this process to occur, you not only allow something phenomenal to occur, you also allow the cycle of life, change, and rejuvenation to take place. As it is supposed to be.

See what might happen if you allow it to be.

When you let your opinions go, you might want to see how it truly is. Your view of it will stay or shape as time goes by. Take the time ahead to understand the true nature of what you had an opinion about. Perhaps you wanted to change it because you were asked to change yourself by someone. Perhaps it worked for you, perhaps it didn't. Understand that it might not work the same way for another person. The circumstances and situations around never neither stays the same nor reacts the same each time history is expected to repeat itself. It is a good step to let go of what influenced you, and begin seeing how things might be.

Embrace differences.

Know that what is like you need not be perfect. And what is unlike you, is allowed to stay imperfect. Tell yourself that you haven't learned every lesson. And there is much to learn. Be accepting of change. Understand the nature of people and things. Just like things, people also get older. They age, season, change in multiple ways, not just physically. Observe the difference and strength you see in others. It could be a difference you notice emotionally, mentally or spiritually. All these shapes depend upon their own lifestyle. When change is inevitable, accepting change becomes necessary. If you liked a childhood friend for who they were as a child, you should sensitize yourself to accepting them as they grow older as well. They will meet other people just like you would, experience new things and experience the same things differently, feel happy, confused, sad all at some point all in their own way. Hence, they will process them their own way. Which is not wrong. It is just unlikely to be very similar to how you process experiences. It means they won't be the same all the time. Just like you. So accepting change makes accepting people and things easier.

Accept yourself.

Do you enjoy your company? Are you your own best friend? Your understanding of yourself, how you were treated, or how you were taught to act might influence you consciously or subconsciously. Having learned about how it is every beings right to exist and thrive, you must nudge yourself to move past whatever made you want to see things with a microscopic lens. If you have problems with who you are, you can start there. First, check what makes you doubt yourself. Then see if the doubts are fair on you. Being harshly judgemental about yourself or extremely partial about your skills can both be deterrents to having a clear understanding of others's existence. Begin from within. Be fair and not only understand yourself, however, also look within for any signs of deep seated trauma or misconceptions that make you have strong judgements about others. Doing the things that are true for you and accepting yourself can help you find peace.

Watch everything you can.

When you watch more, you learn more, gradually. When you say something, mean it. Avoid talking about changing things if you just have an urge to say something. Make it a habit to spend time watching what makes everybody so different. You might find exciting results. This journey to understanding and allowing everything to be as it is might help you feel at peace, reduce chaos and let you relax. Allow your expression to find its way. Open minded observations can be motivating for others who seek your views and for yourself. Your sense of self might get elevated as a result of fairly allowing everything as it is without making it seem too much of a task. Try to see beyond yourself, and look for reality or genuineness to reflect.

Learn from what happens around.

Do your opinions change on a personal basis with everyone you meet? Observation greatly improves opinion forming ability. As you watch, you allow others to be. When you see them as they are, you see more than you expected. You observe how they are not like you imagined. Or you may find how similar they are to your expectations and are a lot more than that. Your limitations get a chance to expand with more possibilities as you give acceptance a time to become a habit. Routinely observe and take your observations in. Allow your thoughts to process. Both conscious thoughts and subconscious ones build over time. When you allow them to form, you see them. When they form, you realize more things. It might push you back to forming stereotypes or not accepting it, however, you can turn away and continue your efforts into accepting everything as it is.

Experience harmony.

The more you quietly observe, the more you slowly grasp the profundity of events. It is a great way to get beyond yourself and understand reasons, make inference, be informed and have a say. This allows your say to be unbiased and well informed. You feel reassured that you can have plain truths as they are. This reassurance brings calmness because the fight between what should be and what is the truth fades in your mind. Try to allow a harmonizing demeanor be adapted by you to accept everything the way it is. Do you know yourself well enough to develop a self-concept?

Give.

If you can't or don't want to change something, you need not do anything about it. You can always give in order to help it grow in any way possible. Your acceptance by itself can help another person to feel nudged to let go. If you want, you can help someone or something by sharing your stance of not having any stance, either positive or negative. Many individuals can use a friend or a word from a stranger who looks at them plainly, without judgment. Such actions seem kind and eventually makes one become kind as they accept everything as it is. And what you can help with care and affection might thrive better if you do so impartially and without expecting things to change for you.