Funny Birthday Wishes for Her
Celebrate your favorite lady’s big day with some humor. Whether it’s your best gal pal or your darling daughter, these funny birthday wishes for girls will make her day. Use some sass, sarcasm, or silliness to ensure your sister-from-another-mister knows how much you love her! Happy Birthday from one fabulous gal to another! You bring the pretty, we'll bring the party. Happy birthday! Birthdays are the universe’s way of telling us to eat more cake. Happy birthday! You’re a really hard individual to shop for… so I didn’t get you anything. Happy birthday! Happy birthday to the only person I would rescue in the event of a zombie apocalypse. If we were living back in Salem in 1692, you totally would have been deemed a witch. And so would I. It’s why we click so well. Happy birthday witchy! Here’s to another year of questionable life decisions! Happy birthday queen. The secret to staying young is make up... Make up an age, then stick with it! Happy Birthday! Happiest of birthdays to the “she” to my “Nanigans”! I wouldn't say you're old... you've just been young for longer than most of us. Happy birthday! They say take every birthday with a grain of salt. I say take it with a whole bunch of salt, and bonus points if it accompanies a very large margarita. Make yours a double. Happy birthday! It’s your party and you’ll cry if you want to; however, I don’t recommend it. You’ll ruin your makeup, and we will be taking a lot of pictures tonight. Happy birthday! Happy birthday to our smart, talented, superbly awesome and crazy cute daughter/niece! You obviously take after your mom/favorite aunt! A quick reminder on your special day… well-behaved women rarely make history. So, this year, let’s go even crazier! Happy birthday!
Funny Birthday Wishes for Him
Poke some fun at the birthday boy with a funny birthday message. Write a card or text your best bloke, closest cousin, greatest grandson, or any other fella celebrating a birthday milestone. And if the recipient of your birthday wishes is your (or anyone’s) father—you can never go wrong with a good old-fashioned dad joke. Happy birthday! I hope you celebrate this birthday the way you celebrated the first one, naked and screaming. Happy birthday! At least you’re not as old as you will be next year. Statistics show that those who have the most birthdays live the longest. Happy Birthday. Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder. Smart, good looking, and funny. But enough about me. Happy birthday! Don't stress about your eyesight failing as you get older. It's nature's way of protecting you from shock as you walk past the mirror. I spent 3 hours searching the internet for the perfect birthday message for you and then I gave up. Happy Birthday. If you got stung by a jellyfish, I would totally pee on you. That’s how much you mean to me bro. Happy Birthday! Happy birthday, Dude! Congrats on getting a year closer to a senior citizen discount at the movies. Not to mention the best parking spots at the grocery store. Birthdays are a lot like golf… It’s a lot more fun if you don’t keep count. Happy birthday! You’re officially OLD. Here’s to writing checks at the grocery store, doing the NYT crossword puzzle by hand and eating dinner by 5pm so we can be in bed by 9pm (you’re right, 8pm is more realistic)! Happy Birthday. Another year together has come and gone. What would I do without you? Not open jars, that’s for sure. Happy birthday man! Happy birthday! Stay sharp, old fella.
Funny Birthday Wishes for Wives
Choose the right words to show your wife just how much you care. On your lady love’s special day, there’s nothing like laughter to bring you two closer. Write a funny birthday message for your girl that has a little sass, maybe some teasing, and a compliment or two in there. It’s your special day! Treat me! Oops, I mean yourself. Treat yourself! (But also me.) Happy birthday to the woman it’s my treat to love every day! You're older; you're wiser; you're sophisticated. Far too sophisticated to be concerned with material things like presents. Happy Birthday! Being your partner rocks. Except on your birthday because you have expensive taste. You're not old, you're just retro! Have a fantastic birthday filled with nostalgic moments. Happy birthday to someone who has attended more birthday parties for kids than adults this year. Those aren't gray hairs you see. They're strands of birthday glitter growing out of your head. Happy Birthday! You may not be able to fold a fitted sheet, but otherwise you’re pretty cool. Happy birthday! Good thing I found you! Because to be honest, I think we both know you couldn’t find glasses if they were on your face, girly. Happy birthday! For your birthday, I wanted to give you something that was both funny and charming, but then I remembered you already have me in your life. Happy Birthday! Happy birthday! Don't forget to iron that birthday suit. Happy birthday to a woman who never ceases to amaze me. Some days your brilliance knows no bounds. Other days you can’t find your keys because you put them in the fridge. You’re unbelievable! Happy birthday to a real life Insta baddie. Happy birthday! Stay golden, girl.
Funny Birthday Wishes for Husbands
Make your man smile with funny birthday wishes for husbands. No two husbands are the same, so choose a sweet and silly birthday wish that matches your husband and his humor. Maybe your guy likes a flirtatious message or some goofy dude humor or will laugh when you poke fun at his old age (again). Either way, your hilarious happy birthday message will surely make his day. I’ll always remember the day I first laid eyes on you. Things have changed physically, that’s why I rely on that fond memory! Don’t count the wrinkles, count the blessings. I love you. Happy birthday! Baby, we may need a fire extinguisher to put out all the candles on this cake. Happy birthday! Happy birthday to the man who has the best-looking husband/wife in the world! As you blow out your candles, remember to kiss your youth behind. Happy birthday, old man! You don’t look a day over 21! That’s of course if I squint and tilt my head sideways. Happy birthday, honey! Happy birthday to a handsome man who still isn’t showing his age… And definitely not acting it. Happy birthday! I’ll love you no matter how bald you get. Tonight, you just might get the chance to unwrap your most special gift: me! Happy birthday. Happy birthday to the man who snores louder than a grizzly bear. Hopefully, I’ll get earplugs for my birthday! I would wish you a happy birthday, but year after year…it’s starting to get old! They say gray hairs symbolize wisdom. I guess you’re the wisest one in the room! Happy birthday, baby. Hope your birthday is as nice as your butt! Happy birthday, honey.
Funny Birthday Wishes for Sisters
Write a sisterly birthday message for the girl who understands you best. Maybe you and your sister have a sibling rivalry to reignite this year, or maybe you’re writing a funny birthday message to your sister-in-law who, for some reason chose to join your zany family. Regardless, write a birthday message as heartfelt as it is hilarious to make your sister feel extra special today. I guess your birthday wish came true because you have me as a sibling! Happy birthday, sissy. Happy birthday! I’m really glad you were born today. My life would be so totally boring without you there to watch. The only other birthday as important as mine. One minute, you’re young and fun. Next, you have a favorite burner on the stove. I think we both know which you are… Happy birthday! Congratulations! You are now old enough to need TWO packs of candles for your cake. Wow, look at you growing up and having birthdays! Adult looks good on you. You’re the ketchup to my mustard. Happy birthday, sister! I’m so glad we’re going to grow old together, and that you have a head start. I’m pretty sure I’m the favorite child, but since it’s your special day, I’ll let you think otherwise. Happy birthday, sister! Mom and dad did a good job raising you. I’m shocked you’ve turned out so well. Happy birthday! Let’s party like it’s your birthday! Oh wait, it really is. HBD! Wishing the most intelligent person I know a great day. That’s me. And to you a very happy birthday. Happy birthday to the girl who thinks she’s God’s gift to this family. OK, you’re one of our many blessings, but not the main one. Happy birthday!
Funny Birthday Wishes for Brothers
Put a smile on your best bro’s face with a funny birthday message. Whether big or little, your brother is important in your life—so strengthen that bond by keeping the sibling rivalry alive! Tease him over your favorite child status, or remind him of how old you two are getting (at least you’re in it together). Happy birthday to my brother who has the world’s greatest sibling! You are so lucky! Hope this makes you smile and shake your head for the rest of your special day! Happy birthday! Can you believe we used to think people our age were adults and had their life in order? I’d give you my last chicken nugget. That’s really saying something. Happy Birthday! Congratulations on being a year older and still maintaining such a low level of maturity; you are truly an inspiration. Your birthday is the perfect excuse to get cake wasted. Let’s dig in! I regret to inform you that your childhood has EXPIRED. Everyone gets to be young once. Today it’s official, your turn is over. Happy birthday! Did someone turn up the heat? Oh wait, that’s just your birthday cake. All the candles are turning the room into an inferno! From one brother to another: There's no easy way to say it—you're getting old. Thankfully, you're aging like a fine wine. Happy birthday to the brother who always had my back, even when we were little and I was a brat. Happy birthday to my brother, who's always been the family clown. Just remember, I'm funnier Happy birthday to my favorite sibling. Just don't tell the other one.
Funny Birthday Wishes for Parents
Celebrate the people who raised you with a knee-slapping birthday wish. Depending on your relationship with your parents, make jokes about their ever-increasing age number, or be kinder by letting them know how cool and hip they still are. Even if they’re feeling weary down to their bones, a funny joke for mom or dad can be really humerus (get it?). Happy birthday, Mom/Dad. It’s funny to think that you used to be young. You’re so old, I believe your best friend’s last name was Flintstone! Don’t worry, I brought you a fabulous gift: ME! If anyone calls you old, hit them with your cane and throw your teeth at them! Don’t let old age get you down, it’s too hard to get back up! Another year older Mom/Dad, but don't worry, you’re still not as old as your jokes! Happy birthday to one old lady/dude who still knows how to party! You rock, Mom/Dad! Congratulations on being born a really long time ago. Happy birthday, mom/dad! No matter what life throws at you, at least you can be grateful you don’t have ugly children. From, the pretty one! Congratulations, you've finally reached the Wonder Years... Wonder where your car is parked? Wonder where you left your phone? Wonder where your glasses are? Wonder what day it is? On the occasion of your birthday, here are some words of wisdom just for you. Make sure to keep on smiling, while you still have teeth! Happy birthday old-timer! Birthdays are like spotting Bigfoot. You really do want to see them but you’re a little afraid of what they’ll look like… You know, I would be a whole lot more excited about you turning one year older if I was in your will. Happy Birthday!
Funny Birthday Wishes for Friends
Write your best birthday message for your bestest friend. Whether you’re throwing them a big birthday bash or celebrating them from afar, every friend will appreciate a funny birthday message from their nearest and dearest. Choose a birthday message that matches your bestie’s interests and energies—from confidante to club-hopper to partner-in-crime. Here’s to many more rotations around the sun. May you live to be old and toothless - Jell-O is the caviar of the future! Happy Birthday. To quote the wise poet 50 Cent, "We gon' party like it's your birthday." It’s so great that my crazy really vibes with your weird. Happy birthday! To an amazing friend on their birthday, my only regret is not meeting you sooner so I could have annoyed you longer. Happy birthday! We'll be friends 'til we're old and senile... And then we'll be new friends! Happy Birthday! Best friends are awesome, especially yours. Happy birthday! Friends celebrate friends on their birthdays. Real friends get you drunk on your birthday. Good thing for you, I'm the second kind. Even with your ripe old age, you’re still the best friend someone could ask for. I’ll get the prune juice ready though. Happy Birthday. Happy birthday best friend! Here’s to another year of laughing at our own jokes, dealing with stupid people and keeping each other sane! Happy birthday! You're officially old enough to start needing retinol. A friend like you is like a good bra, supportive, hard to find, and always getting on my last nerve. But hey, I can't live without them. Happy birthday! Happy birthday to a lifelong friend! I can’t wait until we’re old enough to be terrorizing the senior home nurses together! Yes, we have reached that age… when every compliment we get is usually followed by ‘for your age’. You’re still looking great though… for your age!
Funny Birthday Wishes for Colleagues
Write a funny (but office-friendly) wish for your coworker. The bond between coworkers can be like no other, so they deserve a super special and funny birthday message. Make a playful joke about your workplace or all the shenanigans you get up to together. Ensure your message respects your workplace policies and remains professionally appropriate. Happy birthday dear friend. I’m glad we’re in this together. Wishing you a wonderful day. Wishing you a very Happy Birthday. I’m sorry that you don’t have the day off, but surely celebrating with us is the next best thing. Good luck getting a day off for your birthday. Hope you enjoy it with your work besties. Happy Birthday. Have the day off. I’ll cover for you like I always do anyway! Happy birthday to my perfect partner in crime, who makes it possible for me to pretend to work harder. Free coffee for your birthday! I hope you like instant? See you in the break room. To my favorite coworker. I hope that your birthday is filled with fun and excitement (outside of the office). Thanks for being so great to work with. Happy Birthday. Have the day off! (Just kidding!) Happy birthday, may you get showered with paychecks! Happy Birthday, dear! You are one year wiser and one year closer to retirement today. The amount of effort you put in today will be directly proportional to the amount of effort we put into your party tonight. Happy Birthday! Happy birthday, a coworker who makes to-do lists shorter and office parties longer. Wishing you a very Happy Birthday Boss. Take the day off. We’ve got it under control.
Funny Birthday Wishes for Milestone Ages
Memorable ages deserve memorable birthday messages. Recognize your friend or family member at every important age with a hilarious birthday message fitting their milestone number. Try a warm welcome to adulthood on their 18th birthday or funny happy 50th birthday wishes for a newly-minted quinquagenarian (yes, that’s actually a word). If you don’t do wild things while you’re young, you’ll have nothing to smile about when you’re old. Happy 18th birthday! Happy 18th birthday! Now you’re an adult you can do everything legally you were doing illegally before… I hope you enjoy this birthday because after 21 there’s no other fun birthday numbers to look forward to! Happy Birthday! Have fun legally losing money to alcohol and gambling. Happy birthday! Your thirties are no different from your twenties. You just look 10 years older and things aren’t fun anymore… 30 is a perfect age. You’re old enough to recognise your mistakes but young enough to make some more. Happy birthday! Good lordy, you’re 40! Your mid-life crisis can officially begin… Obviously it started a while ago, but now you don’t have to pretend anymore ? Let’s see…50 in dog years would make you…famous! For being the oldest dog EVER 50!? I demand a recount! Happy birthday… You’re 60 years old? You’re 6 perfect 10s! Happy birthday. Let’s crack open a bottle… of prune juice. Happy 60th birthday wrinkly! Lucky for you, vintage is in! Happy 70th birthday! You’re not getting older, you’re increasing in value! Happy 70th birthday! You’ve learned so much in 80 years – the important thing now is to try remembering it all! Happy 80th birthday! A little tip… age and glasses of wine should never be counted.
Funny Short Birthday Wishes
Write a short and sweet birthday message. Maybe you’ve run out of space on the office birthday card, you need to shoot off a birthday text before heading into a meeting, or you need a cute and concise caption for your celebratory Instagram post. Sometimes, less is more, so these funny birthday messages are still quick to bring a smile to anyone’s face. Move over coffee, today is a day for champagne. Happy birthday! Congratulations on getting slightly older! You’re not old. You’re aged to perfection. Well done – you have still been alive for several years! Could you be any older? It’s better to be on the hill than under it. Happy birthday – I’m so glad you’ll always be older than me! Happy birthday – So far, this is the oldest you’ve ever been! If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas! Pst, don’t grow up! It’s a trap. Happy birthday! May you live so long your wrinkles have wrinkles. Happy birthday! Be careful. Too many birthdays will kill you. Happy birthday! You might be prehistoric, but at least you’re not extinct! Happy birthday!
Funny Belated Birthday Wishes
If you’re late for someone’s birthday, add humor to soften the blow. For funny belated birthday messages, make the silly excuse that you’re extending their birthday celebrations or shift the blame onto someone else (like a carrier pigeon, for example). It's better late than never to send a sweet birthday wish. I know you had lots of birthday wishes yesterday, but who is thinking of you today? Me, that’s who. Happy belated birthday! I’m late (I blame the carrier pigeon). Sorry I missed your birthday…hopefully you’ll have another one next year… This card is too late because: (I forgot your birthday, I was too lazy.) I was kidnapped by a UFO. I'm so sorry I forgot your birthday. The good news is that I also forgot your age. Happy Belated Birthday! It wasn’t my fault… Facebook forgot to remind me about your birthday! Happy Birthday! Don't think of this as a late birthday card. Consider it a very early one for next year. Here's wishing you a wonderful year ahead! You’re amazing, wise, super cool, fantastic, brilliant, intelligent – but don’t get too excited. I’m only saying all these things because I’m a couple of days late! Happy birthday! You can never just celebrate your birthday on one day. You need the whole month and that’s why I’m sending you this card now. This year I’m celebrating your birth-month instead of your birthday. So happy birth-month to you! They say the best friendships are timeless, so here’s a belated birthday wish that transcends the boundaries of time! It’s so tough to believe that you are getting older, that I decided to wish you a happy birthday late this year. Sorry I wasn’t there with you to mourn the loss of your youth. Happy birthday!
Funny Birthday Puns
Use puns to add some pun-ch to your birthday message. Pick a pun to match your birthday person, whether a kid who might like a dinosaur or animal-themed pun or a Spice Girls superfan ready to spice up their life. Whether writing a card or sending a birthday text, use an image, drawing, or GIF that matches your funny and punny birthday message. Celebrate your birthday in style (with a picture of stylish superstar Harry Styles). Spice up your birthday (with an image of the Spice Girls!). Since it’s your birthday, I’ll tell you now you’re a real catch. Fishing you a reel-y happy birthday! You make life so funfetti! How do pickles celebrate their birthday? They relish it. Have a toad-ally awesome birthday. Let’s get this paw-ty started! You’re old, but you donut look it. Happy birthday! Oh ship, it’s your birthday. Have a tea-rrific day. Hope your birthday is one in a melon. Have a whale-y great birthday. You’re pretty dino-mite. Happy birthday!
Funny Birthday Jokes
Share a classic laugh with a funny birthday joke. Choose a funny one-liner or question-and-answer joke to put a smile on your loved one’s face. Kids especially love silly or cheesy jokes if you're celebrating a little one’s birthday. But anyone at any age will appreciate a hilarious birthday joke message. What did the teddy bear say after blowing out his birthday candles? No cake for me, I’m stuffed! Birthday candles don’t exercise because they burn out too quickly! What did the bald guy say when he got a comb for his birthday? "Thanks, I'll never part with it!" Happy Birthday! Birthdays are like cheese. They stink more the older they get. Did you hear about the big birthday candle sale? It was a big blowout! Why do cats love birthdays? They love to purr-ty. Why do candles love birthdays so much? They just wanna get lit! Why are you always warmest on your birthday? People won’t stop toasting you! What type of music is scary for birthday balloons? Pop music. Why don’t owls exchange birthday gifts? They don’t give a hoot! What did the pirate say on his birthday? Arrrg! Aye, Matey! What goes up and never goes down? Your age. How do raccoons celebrate their birthday? They get trashed.
Funny Birthday Quotes
Use a famous birthday quote to make your loved one laugh. Choose a quote by a celebrity your birthday celebrant loves, or find one you think they’ll really relate to. When you’ve run out of ideas, there’s plenty of funny happy birthday wishes by people who have already said it best. “You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.” – Bob Hope “Last week the candle factory burned down. Everyone just stood around and sang Happy Birthday.” – Steven Wright The older you get the better you get, unless you are a banana.” – Betty White “Eventually you reach a point where you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.” – Will Rogers “Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.” – Billie Burke “The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” — Lucille Ball “All the world is a birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much.” – George Harrison “Put candles in a cake, it’s a birthday cake. Put candles in a pie, and somebody’s drunk in the kitchen.” — Jim Gaffigan “You’re getting old when the only thing you want for your birthday is not to be reminded of it.” – Felix Severn “Inside every older person is a younger person—wondering what the hell happened.” — Jeniffer Yane “Middle age is when you’ve met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.” – Ogden Nash “Your favorite kind of cake can’t be a birthday cake, that’s like saying your favorite kind of cereal is breakfast cereal.” – Aziz Ansari “Birthdays are a great time to stop and appreciate gravity. Sure, it makes things sag as you get older, but it also keeps your cake from flying all over the room, so you don’t have to chase it.” – Greg Tamblyn
Funny Birthday Wishes with Emojis
Accompany your silly birthday wishes with fun emojis. Use emojis matching your friend’s personality or interests, or fill your message with joyful birthday-themed emojis. Whatever emojis you choose will add fun and flair to your happy birthday wish. Happy Birthday! ???? Another year closer to being that crazy cat person. ???? Happy Birthday! ???? Here’s to being the only young person in the old people’s club! ???????? Happy Birthday! ???? Remember, age is just a number. In your case, a really BIG number! ???? Lights, camera, birthday! Wishing you a blockbuster year ahead! ???????? Another year spicier, just like your taste in food! Bon appétit! ????️???? You know you’re getting old when your back goes out more than you do. ???? Happy Birthday! Wishing you a day filled with love, laughter, and uninterrupted naps. Because let’s face it, you’re getting old! ???? Happy Birthday! Another chapter in your life and it’s bound to be a bestseller! ???????? Happy Birthday! ???? Here’s to another year of successfully evading the Grim Reaper! ???? Happy Birthday! Here's to a year of gains, both at the gym and in life! ????️♀️???? Happy Birthday! ???? If we were in the Middle Ages, you’d be considered a wizard now. Because, you know, you’ve survived this long! ????♂️ Happy Birthday! ???? Let’s celebrate the age you act, not the age you are. So… party like a 5-year-old! ???? Happy Birthday! ???? Just remember, you’re not old; you’re a classic! ????
Comments
0 comment